Monday, June 27, 2011

Proof That I Am Not A Kid-Hating Monster

Check it out people!

This is me with Stella and Wella's little girl Mirabella. Wella produced a short I wrote and we shot all day Saturday. As a writer, I like to be on set, not to peer over the director's shoulder and hiss "They're not saying the lines right!" (they said the lines fine) but so I can be an extra set of hands wherever they're needed, since everyone's a volunteer, everyone needs help, here I am to help, la la la.

So I went on Starbucks runs, I made watermelon water (pureed watermelon, water, and lime), I cleaned dishes, I started to make the director her special strawberry smoothie but she came down on a break and was horrified that the writer was making her smoothie and took over. I guess she was embarrassed at the perception that I was a lackey, but I didn't really care. I take the attitude of "I'm a servant" on these things. Sometimes to my detriment, but Saturday was fine.

Towards the end of the night, when all the dishes were washed and they were still shooting, I joined Stella in trying to cajole Mirabella to go to sleep. All my usual remedies did NOT work, not crooning 80's music, not crooning Disney tunes. Any steps toward a dark room to prompt Sleepy Eyes were met with howls and yowls.

Finally I busted out what had to be the best remedy for Awake Baby - reading to her recipes from a cookbook that happened to be on the coffee table. We went over the different ways to make creme brulee - butane blowtorch or iron salamander. Mirabella did not have a preference on how to make creme brulee, nor did she go to sleep upon the crooning recitation on how to do so. I finally gave up and handed her back to Stella, but I would like to point out that yes, I tried, I failed, but when I left around midnight, she still wasn't sleeping, and she was soundly in her mother's arms.

A lot of the time, when people hear you don't want children, they assume you must hate them. Not true, not true. No, I do not want to be a mother, I don't think I would make a good one BUT that doesn't mean I can't hold a cute kid and try several ways to get it to go to sleep.

(as far as I know, Mirabella is still up. Let's pray for her mom, Stella, shall we?)


Anonymous said...

It's not your fault. It's not anyone's fault. She's nocturnal, and that's just the way it is.

Allison said...

The favorite thing I've ever heard about children is "Kids are like other people's dogs." Though you do well with both. :)