tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440172.post331921327735470668..comments2023-10-01T07:41:12.677-07:00Comments on God Is Patient (I Am Not): Do You Feel WantedAmy The Writerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11053017916759286317noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440172.post-81634127848657306672009-06-07T13:57:54.537-07:002009-06-07T13:57:54.537-07:00Hey Ames,
Man - you are singing my song -
"...Hey Ames,<br /><br />Man - you are singing my song -<br /><br />"And honestly, no. No I don’t. I feel like I live my life as a series of tests and challenges to be good to an All Powerful Being who only cares if I pass. Like a teacher in a classroom, monitoring things, watching out to see who’s gonna act up, to make sure everyone stays in line. That’s about order. God wants a relationship with me because he wants me to obey him. It’s not about desire. It’s not about want."<br /><br />I think this is a universal feeling - even Mother Teresa felt it - and I therefore feel is it a spiritual warfare issue. I think we are all vulnerable here. If you haven't had a chance, you should really check out "The Ragamuffin Gospel" by Brennan Manning. That book was revolutionary for me on this concept. Whenever I get in a rut, I know I can flip through it and listen to A LOT of Rich Mullins ("Hold me, Jesus" and others....so good to know spiritual GIANTS also felt/feel this way sometimes) and it will help. At least, that's how it is for me.<br /><br />-AshAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440172.post-7686402748860016762009-06-01T13:31:35.976-07:002009-06-01T13:31:35.976-07:00oh the cuddle. i love the cuddle too. one of the...oh the cuddle. i love the cuddle too. one of the first things bren (my husby) ever said about me was, wow you really like to snuggle, huh? when we were doing the long-distance thing (for THREE YEARS!), the thing i missed the most was being spooned and cuddled. it is such a fundamental human need: to be held, and by extension, accepted. i think that's why bren is able to make friends with people almost instantly -- no matter who it is, whether he's met them for the first time or not, he'll hug 'em. like a big bear. a big, warm, tight hug. it's awesome.<br /><br />anyway, i wanted to tell you that i know how you feel about not hearing God or feeling wanted by Him. but that's a bunch of nonsense that we're fed by this earthly realm... that we have to EARN love, we have to do the right thing, say the right thing, wear the right thing, look the right way... in order to be loved. and that's not true. that's not real love. or at least, not Godly love. He loves us UNCONDITIONALLY. if you don't read your bible tomorrow amy, He will STILL love you. TONS. i am wrapping my head around that concept too, because i think i am much more like martha, than mary, running around tons of things, rather than just sitting still at His feet, and bathing in Jesus' love, knowing that He loves me.<br /><br />I think Patty Jean has something there about "letting" yourself feel loved. i definitely had to take that step. <br /><br />and here's another way I think of God. I don't know about us being "part of" God, but I do believe that we're made in God's image. Which means that some essence of his character is imprinted in our hearts. So I think of him as the best Dad ever. He made me. and therefore, like most dads on this planet, He loves me a LOT. He would probably die for me (and He did). He loves me even when I don't do things He wants me to do. He's looking out for me even when I don't think He is. He will never let me down. Because... HE LOVES ME!<br /><br />Bren's reading "Desiring God" by John Piper right now -- keeps talking about how it's God's PLEASURE to do stuff for us. It makes Him happy. Because... He LOVES YOU!!! <br /><br />I know that God's love doesn't feel like a cuddle. But I felt it once, a couple of weeks ago. And I will never forget it.<br /><br />-x-aartilla the funhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05586650848053231224noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440172.post-50280800610847185632009-06-01T12:20:22.637-07:002009-06-01T12:20:22.637-07:00Since I'm more of a practicing agnostic, work with...Since I'm more of a practicing agnostic, work with me here. ...<br /><br />I understand perfectly what you're saying, and I'm trying to relate to my own sense of Higher All-Knowing Being. <br /><br />For me, I guess I view it as I'm already a part of God, The Universe, and Everything. How can I search for being wanted from The All-Knowing, when I'm there already? Maybe it's more of be deciding to be a part of Him/Her/It, and letting myself feel that support and love and abundance. Which is scary for me, because how can one let go?<br /><br />Anyhoo, I'm glad you got the snuggle on. As a Sister SnuggleSlut, I envy. I guess I have to deal with the human aspect of it all - how does one feel wanted from an Object of Affection? <br /><br />Agh... this is more a topic for margaritas and yummy food rather than blogs.... Soon Ms.TheWriter, soon.Patty Jeanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12691303800278533221noreply@blogger.com